Designer’s Diary: Focus on customization

see happening quite frequently in my world is the involvement of the party that will be the recipient of the piece, i.e. the fiancée of the fiancé in most cases. Millennials shop much differently than the rest of us (Hannah Connorton did a great piece on this, in case you missed it.) They know exactly what they want and aren’t afraid to ask for it. Women, and men, are involved in the design, execution and stone selection of their diamond at a much more frequent rate than ever before.

Right now, I’m working on a custom anniversary band for my client William to celebrate his 40 years of marriage to his beautiful wife, Mary. He is the boss, but his daughter Carly has final say on what mom would like. This collaboration is moving along gorgeously and I’m thrilled at the results, but this isn’t to say I haven’t had my fair share of challenges. It can get ugly quickly.

Sometimes the girlfriend, or boyfriend, loses sight of what their loved one picked out for them. They get so caught up in making the piece perfect that they forget they may be hurting someone’s feelings. As a designer, I learned a long time ago not to take anything personally. I don’t get miffed in the least by harsh criticism, but I’ve seen too many a face fall when their partner is giving a vicious diatribe on an item the proposer had picked out in secret, in hopes of making them smile. It’s a difficult dance, but you can nail the waltz of complete client satisfaction if you move through with grace, humility and complete understanding.

When I get caught up in these tiny snafus I always bring the happy couple back to their love story. The ring doesn't really matter! It’s a physical manifestation of a powerful memory in their lives. When you go back to that place with them it’s magical to watch them both whip out the white flag, almost simultaneously, and fall back into a place where they are working on the ring together as a team.

In my five years of building custom work from the ground up I’ve only had one time where the clients and I had a peaceful parting. I said a kind and thoughtful goodbye after a conference call where they exploded at me on the phone, told me I didn't know what I was doing, and the bride told me she was going to take over the design and send it to me in an email.  I recommended them elsewhere and didn't take it personally at all. 

You see, it wasn’t about me, the ring or the process. It was about them. In my opinion, they weren't ready to get married, but they couldn’t look at that. It was too painful. They wanted to fight over the ring instead. I let them take their gloves somewhere else.

Custom work is definitely on the rise and I believe here to stay for quite some time. My suggestion to all is keep the focus where it matters most: on the memories, the experiences and the stories. That is something we all can relate to and puts the details of the build back into perspective. Your shop wants us to create that necklace in a high shine versus matte finish?  No problem. But first let’s have a conversation about why that appeals to your customers and how we can help tell the story together.

Jacqueline Stone is the chief creative officer of her company, Salt + Stone, working primarily with private clients to build custom engagement rings and wedding bands. She can be reached at shine@saltandstone.com.